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"The reason you're suffering is you're focused on yourself." - Tony Robbins.

Suffering derives from the core of ‘I’, ‘me’, ‘mine’.

Even if you say that you’re suffering because of your child, you’re still making it about yourself.

It’s just a more complex way of doing it - through association with another person.

If you are truly suffering, stop focusing on yourself.

Help others. Focus on others. Their needs and their suffering. At least for a day.

And you’ll be at least temporarily relieved of your own suffering.

We are so busy spinning the ‘I’, ‘me’, ‘mine’ story, making it the most important story, but it isn’t.

Once you understand that, it gets easier.

And if you wish to take it to the next level, and see that there isn’t ‘your story’, ‘his story’ and ‘their stories’, but rather ‘our story’, it can even become  kind of fun.

But for that you need to be aware of your own story.

And this is how I do it. 

There are two types of time.

When you understand them both, you can choose HOW you experience life and even WHAT you experience.

I didn’t come up with the concept - the Greeks did.

However, understanding it, literally changed the way I live and see my life.

Watch here.

In real time.

Chronological time.

Make it magical.

I’m explaining how.

I’m explaining how from a boat on a Lithuanian lake.

Watch more videos: http://goo.gl/XAYbwf

Imagine your life as a TV.

You’re flicking through the channels.

Work channel: struggles, goals, striving for good pay, planning holidays.

Love channel: highs and lows of love, relationship hurdles and successes.

Relationship channel: parents don’t understand, children are losing their way, lack of self-esteem.

Meaning channel: what is it all about, you buy a book or two, attend a seminar - how does the universe work?

There are also addiction channels - if you turn on one of those, it’s easy watching.

Until you wake up and have to go back to one of the above channels - then, it’s hang-over time.

But the remote control is in your hands -  always.

It’s up to you which channel to watch. Also, there is a  limitless amount of channels.

If you’re watching a boring programme - that’s your choice.

If you’re watching a complex relationship drama -  that’s your choice.

If you’re watching ER or some kind of an ‘I don’t know what’s it all about programme’ -  that’s also your choice.

Knowledge is rarely exclusive. You can get it on Google.

Many are keen to share their knowledge and ‘the one who knows’ is often mistakenly seen as an expert.

However, stronger than knowledge is experience.

What’s experience?

Simply put: it’s knowledge in action.

Fewer are able to share it but those that can are true experts.

Above knowledge and experience, however, is feeling -  the feeling of knowing and doing.

Nothing preserves, locks in and grounds knowledge and experience better than feeling.

It is through feeling our way through facts, ideas and actions that we register and cement them on a subconscious level.

This is particularly important to know when choosing a mentor - in business, spirituality, psychology or any other field:

How deep is their knowledge?

Have they experienced what they know?

Have they felt it?

You can learn more about the difference between the three here.

Your brain, society, and the world around you are  made out of systems and thinking models.

Don’t ignore them.

Seek out patterns.

Seek out  how everything is connected beneath  the surface: whether it is the  structure of your favourite TV series, thinking models that your favourite thought-leader employs, or the way your child organises his or her thoughts.

Cracking a pattern is like cracking a code: it takes you to the next level.

It helps you formulate your own kind of thinking by deciding which systems and patterns to  ditch and which to  make your own.

For me and many other people I know and work with, writing is the best way to understand how we think and to shape and mould it accordingly. 

You can learn how to do it here.

Many travel to see sights, enjoy a cocktail in the pool of a fancy hotel and, in general, get a dose of excitement.

What if you looked at travelling as a way of expanding your mind and thinking, a tool to help you become aware of your system of beliefs, your judgments and your ideas, and to call these all into question?

Doubt them.

Investigate them.

Even revise them.

The way you connect your thoughts and points of reference determines how you see the world.

The variables that you take into account are usually influenced by your environment(s).

When you are in the process of making a decision, you call a number of variables into your mind and choose between them.

What travelling - if done consciously - can do, is give you a new set of variables that you wouldn’t have otherwise come across.

What writing - if used as a tool - can do, is simply bring forth the variables you have been toying with your whole life (so you see them more clearly) and start paving the way for new vari...

Whatever you do, do it with excellence.

Perfection is for amateurs.

Excellence is for masters.

You only master something by learning when to take action and then to allow it.

Mastery never reeks of struggle.

That’s perfection.

Mastery is a gently controlled flow of particular area in life, which is tamed with joy.

You can pick whether to be a perfectionist or master.

You can learn more about the difference between the two here.

Whether it is your business or life, don’t make it about you.  

Make it about your client.

Make it about your partner.

Make it about the other.

Make it about the cause. 

Make it about the ideas.

Make it about the change.

Don’t make it about you.

In celebrity-overrun , individualism-powered culture, we celebrate ‘making it about me’.

True flow comes from making it about the other. 

My flow stops once I make it about ‘me’.

Ego loves making it about ‘me’.

Ego hates making it about others.

But ego will always remain dissatisfied, it never has enough of ‘me’.

Making it about others is the best way to move past your ego and into your flow.

We get into flow at the Hero’s Journey Circle.

Your worth isn’t what other people think your worth is.

Your worth can’t be defined by any measures outside of you.

You define your worth. 

In any kind of relationship - with a client, a lover or a family member - you define your worth. Only you. 

And you get exactly what you ask for. The monetary expression, or the way people around you treat you, is a  direct reflection of your (self) worth.

It’s what you settle for.

And you’ll always settle for what your standard is.

And your standard is directly linked to how you define your worth.

In the Hero’s Journey Circle, we do lots of deep work around understanding your (self) worth. Check it out. 

We expect people to treat us with kindness, love and respect. But the truth is that some simply don’t. They just don’t. There are moments in life when we are shocked to discover that our life partner, work colleague or a friend can be not only unkind to us but also mean, emotionally violent and even toxic. How about that?

What happens then to our faith in love, morality and kindness?

We feel betrayed. It’s unfair. They shouldn’t have said that. They shouldn’t have done that.

No, probably they shouldn’t have.

But the question and greatest test for you is to figure out how you respond to that. What are you like in the face of adversity, dishonesty and violence? Do you also compromise your humanity and values by responding to it aggressively - with anger, fear and the desire to harm and hurt?

No, I am not talking about the whole idea ‘turn the other cheek’ here.

I loved what Michelle Obama said in relationship to Trump’s rude, bullying rhetoric toward minorities: ‘When they go lo...